Subcultural engagement for the 21st Century...
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The Late Shift of DOOM

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iconoplast

00:57 / 11.11.04

Get a pen. Push the cork down into the bottle. It's a tad declasse, but it works in a pinch.

And, for the record, I feel bad about participating in the steve threads. But not /that/ bad because they really were so, so funny.

Bed Head

01:00 / 11.11.04

Dude, can’t you just push the cork in?

Sorryeverybody is quite lovely. It’s sweet of them all to try. I just don’t want them to feel they have to. Has any other election ever provoked such a response?

Bed Head

01:05 / 11.11.04

Ooh, no, don’t use a pen. Use your fingers. It’s a delicate job that requires sensitivity. It may help to wear a blindfold, and let yourself feel. You have to probe the cork’s weak spots, you have to detect the flaws in its structure.

Saint Keggers

01:09 / 11.11.04

Just smash the damn bottleneck against the table top! Sheesh!

ONLY NICE THINGS

01:13 / 11.11.04

Unfortunately, the only decent bottle among them has a synthetic cork, and as such is resistant to pushy antics. Kegger's plan has merit, but I fear my coworkers might look askance. Instead, I propose... to wait the fuckers out. Glass has to decay at some point...

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

01:13 / 11.11.04

yoyoyyoyoyo!

That's right people.

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

01:15 / 11.11.04

PS. BH, I will reply to your message proper soon enough (it is big!) - OH YES - because I LOVE IT. But I have to say. I am not teh emo! Really. I battle against this. I'm cooler than that, aren't I?

Bed Head

01:17 / 11.11.04

I hate synthetic corks. They’re clearly the invention of a shadowy cabal of evil corkscrew manufacturers. Who probably donate money to the Republican Party.

Do you have a drill in the house, Tann?

And Suedey - hurrah!

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

01:17 / 11.11.04

PPS. I cried a little. Maybe I am emo!

I dunno. I'm a little drunk, but I'm happy for a change. I feel good, and I feel like I want to ask a bar maid out. Even though I know it will be a mistake. Why not, eh?

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

01:19 / 11.11.04

Fuck yeah hurrah BH! You worry about nothing, you crazy goon.

We had some kind of weird cork screw in the house once, but I can't find it now. I take this as permission to drink all the wine through principle.

Papess

01:20 / 11.11.04

Totally lost in this conversation as I have spent the past 15 minutes bouncing on my big yellow exercise ball with my little guy.

YAY! Bouncy balls are funtastic!

Saint Keggers

01:20 / 11.11.04

My magic pizza rock wants youto drink that wine!!!

ONLY NICE THINGS

01:23 / 11.11.04

Sometimes I suspect that Due South lied to us about the Canadian way of life.

Saint Keggers

01:24 / 11.11.04

Actually it was creppily acurate. except we drink more

Alex's Grandma

01:25 / 11.11.04

I think if you just get up on your desk right now, Haus, and scream, like you mean it " Expense account wine par-tay right now, muthafuckers ! " then before you know it, the office'll be very much like one of those Bacadi Breezer ads.

Saint Keggers

01:43 / 11.11.04

Damn, I want garlic bread.

Papess

01:45 / 11.11.04

Actually it was creppily acurate. except we drink more

drink more...and BOUNCE more! Keggers, save some magic pizza rock for me, please. I need it to feed the meese grazing 'bout my igloo.

Wait.....I think I hear something. I think, I think, I think I can hear Sting's career calling from the beyond!

Wow, I am a medium.

Imagine, all this time I thought I was just below average.

Saint Keggers

01:47 / 11.11.04

my pizza rock should be cooked on medium!

Bed Head

01:50 / 11.11.04

Oooh, ooh. I have garlic bread! And I don’t even want it right now. It’s just sitting there, waiting for me to want it.

I’d happily share, but I feel pretty sure my throwing arm isn’t up to it.

Saint Keggers

01:52 / 11.11.04

the thought is appreciated.

Papess

02:12 / 11.11.04

Have magic pizza rock on head and the cheese is dripping into my eyes, burning them. Now I am the "lucky lucky wounded by a pizza rock".

Life doesn't get any better than this. At least not in Canada. Now, I am the envy of two nations!

Whisky Priestess

02:14 / 11.11.04

Re your I Have No Corkscrew But I Must Drink dilemma, Tann - this is why I always carry a Swiss Army Knife, or cheap knockoff thereof.

For the first time in two weeks, I have some work tomorrow. Unfortunately, I've got into the habit of waking in the early afternoon and going to bed at about dawn. In an attempt to break this cycle, I went to bed tonight at 1.30. Result? 2 1/2 hours of tossing and turning next to the most contentedly sleeping man in history, and little niggles stampeding through my head like miniature buffalo.

Which is why I am here. Worst thing is, I have two corkscrews, but no wine.