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So Long, Mr Lateshift Prostate

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01:24 / 25.08.07

Huzzah.

Essential Dazzler
(prev. I'm The Goddamn Shonen Bat)

01:27 / 25.08.07

God-Fucking-Dammit! I was about to hit post on "So Long, Mr. Lateshift!"

Prnss gt rbbt s fck vwls

01:27 / 25.08.07

My little brothers just destroyed my faith in humanity by not liking Gogol Bordello.

The reasons they gave where "they are too french" (which they aren't, I don't think) and they are all "pikeys".

Having non-european looking dancers probably didn't help either.

Ugh.

Essential Dazzler
(prev. I'm The Goddamn Shonen Bat)

01:28 / 25.08.07

No-one dislikes Gogol Bordello.

CASE CLOSED.

Too-Pure-Pure Boy
(prev. Transfer's butler, Sebastian)

01:29 / 25.08.07

Ahh, the little seen in captivity French Pikey... Fuck a rolling doughnut.

So, I hear Princess is researching chromosomal abnormalities. In his absence, can we call you Evil Scientist Jr.?

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01:31 / 25.08.07

Hmm, my research is only going as far as Wikipedia. And I'm not really looking at the science words, just the symptoms. So I'm not sure if I really deserve it.

But Ok.

Deculture Decedent

01:33 / 25.08.07

And nicely done, Princess.

Applause. Congrats. Cheers. Flowers, cash, and the finest domme's in blue vinyl I could find hanging around the house.

Oh, I suppose I should do something for you, too, while I'm at it. Starting a nice new shift for us and all.

And, yeah, nobody dislikes Gogol Bordello. They may lie in public, for a variety of confused reasons, but it's only lies.

Deculture Decedent

01:34 / 25.08.07

Look at the science words. You know you want to.

Well, I want you to.

ALL KINDS OF DEAD TREES
(prev. Papers regarding Tlön & Uqbar)

01:35 / 25.08.07

It's 4:30 inna afternoon and I'm just now arriving at work. At least it's only a four hour shift, but you know. It's not like I got much of anything done today.

But there's a lateshift! To distract me.

I crave escaragots in garlic sauce on french bread. With wine. And limburger cheese.

Prnss gt rbbt s fck vwls

01:35 / 25.08.07

I am convinced. I am looking up "Aneuploidy".

Tommorow it will be my word of the day too.

Too-Pure-Pure Boy
(prev. Transfer's butler, Sebastian)

01:39 / 25.08.07

It sounds like a Dick Van Dyke cockney expression. Could our North American contributors oblige us by saying it aloud to see how it feels?

Essential Dazzler
(prev. I'm The Goddamn Shonen Bat)

01:40 / 25.08.07

Wine is nice. I'm drinking Wine right now (And risking life and limb carrying Glasses over new carpet) but Snails and Garlic sounds a bit fancy.

Deculture Decedent

01:40 / 25.08.07

See, I never knew how different these overseas lateshifts could be. In the North American lateshifts we have cheese, alcohol, and breaded things - fancy meets like fish, snails, and corndogs. Elsewhere, where they think night is in the middle of the day (which I can confirm by looking at the sun out my window and will have none of this round Earth business!), it's all aneuploidy and chromosomal things.

Prnss gt rbbt s fck vwls

01:42 / 25.08.07

I am lured by your escargots.

Five minutes searching for moderate/high level knowledge on snail genetics has turned up nothing worth repeating here.

Essential Dazzler
(prev. I'm The Goddamn Shonen Bat)

01:43 / 25.08.07

Our Lateshifts are made of SCIENCE!

Deculture Decedent

01:43 / 25.08.07

'Aneuploidy' works well for a fake-cockney surprise, especially if I could find an umbrella to bob on, while doing so.

Too-Pure-Pure Boy
(prev. Transfer's butler, Sebastian)

01:44 / 25.08.07

Well, according to an article in yesterday's Guardian, slugs (who have been doing very well out of our torrential summer) sometimes bite off one another's peni during sex.

We humans, we have invented nothing.

Deculture Decedent

01:47 / 25.08.07

Michele Foucalt, right? Sex is boring. Human sex. Because of every other living thing trumping us.

Prnss gt rbbt s fck vwls

01:48 / 25.08.07

Actually, I know a fact about Bannana slug sex, and I will repeat it here.

This is something I did not research just now. I wish it to be know that this was already in my head at least 2 years ago.

Bannana slugs, which are luminous yellow, are hemaphroditic. In each sex act one partner acts as a "male" and the other as a "female". During coitus the "male" chews of his penis so as to plug the "female" shut. The "female", due to slug lust, is not happy with the plug so she eats it out.

But, if the "male" is also a "female", that must mean he knows it's just going to get eaten out anyway? Or maybe each slug think that only it has come up with this cunning escape from enforced monogamy.

ALL KINDS OF DEAD TREES
(prev. Papers regarding Tlön & Uqbar)

01:49 / 25.08.07

Fancy? Snails and garlic? You can do snails and garlic for about five bucks all told, including the garlic bread. It makes my tummy happy.

Meanwhile, it feels as though we've been transported to the arctic circle at this time of year - it's the lateshift, but the SUN DOES NOT GO DOWN.

ALL KINDS OF DEAD TREES
(prev. Papers regarding Tlön & Uqbar)

01:51 / 25.08.07

Also - "Cram it with walnuts" is made of win.

Prnss gt rbbt s fck vwls

01:52 / 25.08.07

I have found an interactive apple snail genetics game for you all.
Enjoy your edutainment.

Essential Dazzler
(prev. I'm The Goddamn Shonen Bat)

01:57 / 25.08.07

How the hell do they expect people to learn when there are so many words?

I just ticked boxes for a while then got bored.

Prnss gt rbbt s fck vwls

01:57 / 25.08.07

Wow, I am learning a lot about apple snails.
And all this because I started looking at Kate Bornstein inspired essays.

Unrelated: What does PVT mean in cruising abreviations? Two men have just told me they can accomodate PVT.

It is rare to find a sexy term I haven't mastered. I feel unmanned before it.

ALL KINDS OF DEAD TREES
(prev. Papers regarding Tlön & Uqbar)

01:59 / 25.08.07

PVT=pervert? Perhaps they can accomodate perversions?

Essential Dazzler
(prev. I'm The Goddamn Shonen Bat)

02:01 / 25.08.07

Could we rename this "Lateshift Prostate - crammed with Walnuts"?

Prnss gt rbbt s fck vwls

02:04 / 25.08.07

Actually, I've already suggested a name change to satisfy your whims. I don't think I'm allowed to suggest another.

Essential Dazzler
(prev. I'm The Goddamn Shonen Bat)

02:08 / 25.08.07

I'm touched. In an entirely appropriate way.

Deculture Decedent

02:08 / 25.08.07

That snail thing would be better if it were a proper use of the technology. By which I mean it should allow me to put red and white jumpers or yellow raincoats on the snail. Or wings.

Essential Dazzler
(prev. I'm The Goddamn Shonen Bat)

02:12 / 25.08.07

You know, there's very little to stop you doing most of that right now, when you think about it.

1)Catch snails.
2)Knit tiny jumpers.

And you're done!

Prnss gt rbbt s fck vwls

02:13 / 25.08.07

Actually, yes, that would be a better use of the technology.

For those who are interested, here are some recipes for apple snails.

I think I need to sleep now. I have a man to greet in the morning.

Goodnight my darlinks.

Essential Dazzler
(prev. I'm The Goddamn Shonen Bat)

02:14 / 25.08.07

Goodnight, you delightful beast.

Go recharge your sexy.

Night, you two.

Or, one, since Pacific isn't saying 'Goodnight,' but saying 'goodnight.'

Essential Dazzler
(prev. I'm The Goddamn Shonen Bat)

02:18 / 25.08.07

I'm sorry.

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