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Text Adventure Game Emulator #1

 
  

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Fly Beezy (War Minister)
(prev. Y SO ALT?)
16:16 / 21.09.05
You awaken.

You are lying naked in bed in Caroline's bedroom.

You are alone.
 
 
Quantum - killed by hadrons
(prev. Quantum)
16:46 / 21.09.05
Listen. Then dress and forage for bathroom, breakfast and beeyatch.
 
 
Old dear. Gin. Problems
17:01 / 21.09.05
And mobile phone charger with... etc.
 
 
Old dear. Gin. Problems
17:02 / 21.09.05
(This is not a euphemism for anything sexual, apparently.)
 
 
Fly Beezy (War Minister)
(prev. Y SO ALT?)
17:06 / 21.09.05
The only sound you can hear is the ticking of the bedside clock.

What would you like to dress in?
 
 
Old dear. Gin. Problems
17:12 / 21.09.05
Examine clothes on the floor, and around the room.
 
 
Quantum - killed by hadrons
(prev. Quantum)
17:51 / 21.09.05
What would you like to dress in?
Something understated...

 
 
P. Horus Rhacoid
23:20 / 21.09.05
Dress in trenchcoat, if available, thereby looking like totally sketchy flasher.
 
 
8===>Q: alyn
07:18 / 22.09.05
Find magic trousers, shirt. X magic trousers, shirt.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
15:08 / 22.09.05
Also check the time on the ticking clock.
 
 
Fly Beezy (War Minister)
(prev. Y SO ALT?)
16:57 / 22.09.05
You search the room for clothes. You find no magic trousers or kinky boots, and none of the clothes you were wearing last night.

You do however find a neatly folded pile of clothes which look like they would fit you. There are a pair of dark blue jeans, generic sexless-but-comfy underpants and socks, a pair of stylish black sneakers with silver trim, and a black t-shirt. On closer examination the black t-shirt has an image and some words on the front:



As these are the only clothes in the room, and to save teh Computer's time, you put them on. They fit improbably well.

The clock reads: 9.02
 
 
Goodness Gracious Meme
18:33 / 22.09.05
Strike a pose...

Vogue.
 
 
The Freewheeling Penis
(prev. The Freewheeling Convo)
19:36 / 22.09.05
Examine room. Where's our gear? If gear here, pick it up.

Then exit room.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
01:52 / 23.09.05
Look for Caroline's lipstick. Use it to draw on a mirror. Draw a heart with your names on either side as a gesture of love to her.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
01:53 / 23.09.05
Also ask the next person you see "Do I look like a slut?"
 
 
8===>Q: alyn
02:25 / 23.09.05
Wonder what my name is...
 
 
Lord Morgue
12:01 / 23.09.05
Wonder where the lions are...
 
 
Fly Beezy (War Minister)
(prev. Y SO ALT?)
12:35 / 23.09.05
You strike a pose and vogue for a few moments. Sadly there is no-one here to appreciate your dancing skills.

You examine the room. The room is small, and stylishly furnished. The carpet is thick and black. The walls are painted a pleasant shade of dark blue. There is a framed poster of Frank Sinatra on one wall. There is an exit to the East.

The only furniture in the room consists of a bed, and a bedside table on which there is an ashtray, an alarm clock, a small statue of Bast, and a music system.

The bed is upholstered in black silk. There are small metal hoops embedded into the headboard and the bottom of the bed, just the kind of things one could attach ropes or hooks to, as you can now personally attest to.

There are several piles of books and CDs on the floor by the bed.

Your satchel is here. You pick it up.

You look for Caroline's lipstick. It is not on the floor or on the bedside table. You open the drawer in the bedside table. In the drawer is some lipstick (the colour is called 'Bad Faith'), a compact mirror, and a small notebook.

You flip open the mirror and use the lipstick to draw a heart on it, as a gesture of love to Caroline. You add her name on one side.

You wonder what your name is. You have no idea. You settle for writing 'ME' on the other side of the heart, and put the compact mirror on the bed where you hope she'll see it, you lovesick fool.

You wonder where the lions are. You have no idea, and wonder where the fuck that non-sequitor came from. No idea.
 
 
Vincennes: Bringing Sassy Back
13:50 / 23.09.05
examine notebook.
 
 
autran
19:48 / 23.09.05
PLAY random CD IN SOUND SYSTEM
ADORE BAST
 
 
The Freewheeling Penis
(prev. The Freewheeling Convo)
17:52 / 24.09.05
Go East
 
 
Fly Beezy (War Minister)
(prev. Y SO ALT?)
00:33 / 27.09.05
You examine the notebook. All the pages are blank except for the first one. On the first page is a list titled 'To Do - by end of Sept. 05':

1. Write songs.

2. Get job in local bar.

3. Assignment #13.


You put a random CD in the music system and press play. The sordid sounds of 'Fuck The Pain Away' by Peaches can be heard. You kneel before the statue of Bast and bow your head for a short interval.
 
 
Fly Beezy (War Minister)
(prev. Y SO ALT?)
00:35 / 27.09.05
You go east.

You are in a relatively normal-looking living room, at least by the standards of borderline bohemian 20-30something lazy dossers. There is a sofa, a television, and a desk and chair. On the desk is a laptop computer attached to various other bits of technology including a printer and what look like a couple of other hard-drives.

There is an exit to the North that leads to a kitchen area. There is also a door to a bedroom to the South, one to the West, and a door to a bathroom to the South-West.

There is a corpse lying in the middle of the floor.
 
 
Who Is Grumpy-Pants, Anyway?
00:53 / 27.09.05
Examine corpse. Gingerly. In a Gil Grissom style manner.
 
 
Fly Beezy (War Minister)
(prev. Y SO ALT?)
22:56 / 27.09.05
The body is that of a twentysomething male in a Joy Division t-shirt. You recognise it as the body of Michael, Caroline's flatmate. Cause of death would appear to be an instance of FACE SHOOTING, as indicated by the small entry wound in the forehead and the massive exit wound where the back of the head used to be. Some of Michael's brains and blood and fragments of his skull form an interesing pattern on the carpet.

"Well", you say to nobody in particular, "This was no suicide."
 
 
The Freewheeling Penis
(prev. The Freewheeling Convo)
01:39 / 28.09.05
Boot up laptop. While it loads search Michael's totally dead body for cash and keys. Be careful not to leave any prints on him.
 
 
The Freewheeling Penis
(prev. The Freewheeling Convo)
02:01 / 28.09.05
(So it looks like Caroline set us the fuck up the bomb?)
 
 
Who Is Grumpy-Pants, Anyway?
12:23 / 28.09.05
(Maybe he died of natural FACE SHOOTING...)
 
 
Fly Beezy (War Minister)
(prev. Y SO ALT?)
14:19 / 28.09.05
You switch on the laptop computer. A blue screen appears on the monitor, complete with white text that reads 'MEMORY WIPE COMPLETE. POWER SOURCE DETONATION IN 2 MINUTES AND 15 SECONDS.'. You try pressing a few buttons and turning the computer off, but nothing happens in response.

You search Michael's corpse, and find only a five dollah note and a signed photograph of the actor Paul Rudd.
 
 
Fly Beezy (War Minister)
(prev. Y SO ALT?)
14:21 / 28.09.05
(Speculation and discussion in the Discussion thread, please!)
 
 
The Freewheeling Penis
(prev. The Freewheeling Convo)
20:54 / 28.09.05
Make deadpan remark.

Furrow brow and concentrate. Throb forehead veins:

SUMMON FITE!
 
 
Quantum - killed by hadrons
(prev. Quantum)
21:10 / 28.09.05
Attempt to remove power source (i.e. battery) from laptop while waiting for FITE!, else lob it into bedroom and shut the frickin' door if that takes too long.
 
 
The Freewheeling Penis
(prev. The Freewheeling Convo)
22:42 / 28.09.05
(Nooo! The lipstick valentine!)
 
 
Lord Morgue
07:45 / 29.09.05
That's enough time to drop the fucker in the bath and drown it.
(Ahem) Drop Fucker (and by "fucker" we mean either the power source, or the whole computer if we can't seperate the two) in the bath and drown it. Exit house.
Contemplate how every fucking little thing seems to go skewiff when we have a little nap.
Wonder how the poor nullo bastard in the other game is doing, at least we've got all our bits (give our bits a reassuring pat).
 
 
The Freewheeling Penis
(prev. The Freewheeling Convo)
12:21 / 03.10.05
(c-c-c-c-c-cmon!)
 
  

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